How to Explain Transgender to Kids with Simple Words

But along with that happy news, comes natural curiosity from kids. They need help understanding what it means to be transgender.
Here are our suggestions for explaining what it means to be transgender, without making it sound scary.
Teach diversity at home - what kind of words should I use to explain transgender basics?
The best way to explain transgenderism to kids is to keep it simple. All they need to know is that when someone is transgender, their brain is telling them one thing but their body parts donât match what their brain is telling them. Itâs not a flaw; itâs just a cell-growth mix-up that can happen at birth.
Here's a simple way to put it:
âTransgender peopleâs inner thoughts donât match their outside parts.â
For example, maybe a transgender person consistently thinks to themself:
âWow that dress is really pretty. I wish I could wear it.â
But that person has a penis so they can't say it out loud ever because everyone assumes theyâre a boy and shouldnât wear dresses.Â
Teach diversity at home - we're all the same, but different

The most important thing for you to get across when explaining transgender basics is that transgender people are exactly the same as everyone else, except their brain and their body parts don't match.
You can remind them that everyoneânot just transgender peopleâis born with a trait that makes them different from other people. That's a good thing!
Here are some words you could use to make your point:
âWe're all different from each other. We should always accept people for how they are and make sure they feel safe and included. It's never okay to make people feel sad or left out just because they look different than we do.â
Offer as many words of encouragement as you can here. Try to get your child involved in the conversation so they feel like they're part of a larger movement toward treating people fairly. Empathy at its best!
The odds of your child wanting to learn more will be much greater if they feel confident enough to participate in a mutual conversation.
TIP:Â There will be inconvenient times when your child wants to ask you something about transgenderismâlike when youâre working, reading, or talking with someone else. Either make the time then or ask your him/her to remember their thoughts so they can share with you later.
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Teach diversity at home - keep talking about transgender people as your child grows
It's wonderful that you're taking time to learn how to effectively explain the basics of transgender to your child. It's a huge step forward. But it doesn't stop there.
Continue examining your own biases and educating yourself about how to talk to your child about uncomfortable subjects. If they consider you a good source of consistent, honest, accurate information, they'll continue coming to you with more and more serious questions as they grow.
If you don't know the answer, admit it, and look it up together.
Keep going!Â
More Resources:
- The Science of Being Transgender (video)
- How to teach your kid what transgender means
- How to mitigate your unconscious bias
If you found this article helpful, please check out How to Explain Transgender to Kids Using Simple Words. It's a concise guidebook for parents that's full of more suggestions about how to explain transgender to a child simply, including instructions for discovering (subtly) what your child already knows, explaining transgender stereotypes, answering inevitable questions, and cultivating an accepting environment at home. |
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